2014: New Year, New Goals, New Resolve

Last year I publicly declared that New Years Days was my new favorite holiday. I still agree with myself. Good job self! To borrow words from my year ago self - "It's the second fifth (so I was a little slower this year) day of a new year. A year full of motivation, hope, and inspiration. Oh how I'm in desperate need of all those things and so excited about them. " Last year when I wrote that, it was after an unintentional 3 month blog break because of the loss of my dad. I gave a somewhat sad update on the happenings up until that moment to catch you up, shared my reasons for restored hope, and share my goals for 2013. This year, surprise surprise, I took another unintentional break (just two-ish months this time). I'll update you, but it won't be sad this time!

Can we all just agree that November and December are insanely busy and a really hard time to make time for things you love doing like blogging? I now know November and December will always be hard for me to blog in. It's just a busy season. In November I had two huge catering orders, two of my biggest, not to mention the things I had to bake and cook for holiday celebrations. I intentionally remembered the year mark of my dad no longer being on earth. I celebrated Thanksgiving three times. December was also just as full, baking, Christmas shopping, Christmas celebrations, visiting friends and family. All good updates!

Having a church family to celebrate this round of holidays with was more beautiful than I ever could have imagined. From the very first time we met in June, many of us strangers, especially me, our goal was to become a family, a group of people who are becoming disciples together, genuinely loving one another, who long to live on mission, genuinely loving our neighbors, so we can make disciples who make disciples. Most of these people, I've know for just 7 months, and I already can't imagine my life without them. Last year I was terrified of three weeks off of work and wanted to get out of my town as quick as possible so I didn't have to be alone. This year I wanted to be in my town because I knew I wouldn't be alone. I wanted to share holidays with them. I still had sad moments where I missed my dad a lot, but it was survivable because I wasn't alone. I had my Arise Church family. I had my loving, amazing friends. On my worst day of the year, the day I remember every moment of the day instead of random unexpected moments, that my dad isn't here, I wanted to be with them. And they wanted to be with me. It was beautiful. Oh, and I had a wreck and am currently without a vehicle.

 So to borrow words from my self again:  "And now it's January. I have officially changed my favorite holiday to New Years. I reaffirm that New Years is my favorite holiday. It's so full of hope, motivation, inspiration, and renewal. It truly is a breath of fresh air. Of course I know I'll still have sad break down moments [and downs mixed in with the ups like being vehicle-less], but January and a new year feel like the sun coming out after a big scary tornado warning or hurricane landfall."

I did look back at last year's resolutions. Some of them were accomplished, some of them changed, some of them didn't happen. BUT, that isn't going to stop me from making a new set of goals for this year. Some synonyms of resolution are resolve, intent, intention, aim, and plan. My intent in resolving to make resolutions for 2014 is to be intentional and aim for my planned goals this year (like what I did there?). So without further blabbering ado (I wanted to say this but realized I didn't know what it meant exactly, ado - hubbub, bustle, flurry, fuss), my goals for 2014.

1. Take accountability deeper. 
2. Pay attention to food intake. 
3. Work out more. 
4. Read more - blogs and books. 
5. Connect more: A. In person, initiate hang outs with friends, text, call, respond more, and put away my phone when I'm with people. B. In the world wide web. Comment on blogs I read regularly. Be active in blog forums. Make blog friend connections. 
6. Write more - blogging and journal. 
7. Spend time with Jesus and don't stop. 
8. Pray for my friends, family, and future (job, husband, calling, dreams, etc). 
9. Wear makeup more regularly. 
10. Buy less. 
11. Tithe more. 
12. Live UP so I can be thankful for the living IN that increases more and more and be more motivated and prepared to live OUT. 
13. I prefer even numbers, but if 13 is good enough for Taylor Swift, it's good enough for me! Believe that I have enough of God's grace and the ability to call on the Holy Spirit to make this (being trained to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live a more self-controlled, upright, and godly life) happen: 

What are your goals? Share them with me! I'm a goal person, I love hearing about other people's goals. 

A New Year

It's the second day of a new year. A new year full of motivation, hope, and inspiration. Oh how I'm in desperate need of all those things and so excited about them. This isn't the first time I took an accidental two and a half month break, but probably the first time I've had real reasons. Warning - sad update, but do not despair, hopefulness will come at the end.

Since I last blogged, on October 11th, a lot has happened. My dad's health began to decline rapidly. On October 14th, my favorite day, I was blessed to be surrounded by loving friends all day. It made the news of finding out a transplant for my dad wasn't an option and no treatments would work. The news we received that day was that there could be months, weeks, or days left in his life. It was exactly one month and four days later that we lost him.

November was HARD! On the 6th he was hospitalized and started to lose memory. My brother and I got there on November 7th. We sat in the hospital waiting, praying, and crying until the 11th. The real world demanded work, so we had to go back. On Sunday November 18th, we got the call. Again I was blessed to be surrounded by loving, incredible friends and support that day. His memorial was the day before Thanksgiving. It was hard, but most of the time I felt better than I thought I would.

Then came December. December was way worse than I even knew it could be! For the rest of my life I'll feel the urge to hug anyone, stranger or not, when I find out they've lost a parent, spouse, or child. I wish we could all get together every year before Christmases without our loved ones to hug each other and talk about the ones we miss and the reality of how hard it is that the "Most Wonderful Time of Year" for most people is different for us now. It really is something you can't understand until you've been through it and it just plain sucks! Again, so thankful for friends and family that give hugs, read negative texts, deal with bad moods, help clean apartments, fold clothes, give gifts, don't get mad about unanswered phone calls, and take me in so I'm not alone even if I think I want to be.

And now it's January! I have officially changed my favorite holiday to New Years. It's so full of hope, motivation, inspiration, and renewal. It truly is a breath of fresh air. Of course I know I'll still have sad break down moments, but January and a new year feels like the sun coming out after a big scary tornado warning or hurricane landfall (can you tell I'm from Mississippi?). I'm [hopefully] getting chosen for boot camp that starts at the end of January to lose the weight I put on while I've done nothing but eat out or eat holiday food and leftovers since October plus more. Also, back to meal planning! Back to blogging healthy recipes (and meal plans). However, I can't promise not to blog some of the unhealthy hits I made for the holiday though. You didn't think I stopped cooking totally did you?!

I discovered one thing I can count on, no matter how sad I get, I will still cook impressive things for other people. I might be eating frozen pizzas and way too much drive thru food, but I'll make three delicious, impressive Wintermint cakes in one week and too many batches of poured icing sugar cookies to count.

And so... HOPE! I'm full of that stuff (hope) right now. So full of it that I actually made realistic achievable New Years resolutions. I even came up with objectives for my goals. This is serious guys! Of course I'll share them with you, because I'm all share-y like that.

1. Wait for it... Blog more! That one is for you. And me! Makes me feel good. How? Plan it! Use Mondays off to prep posts. I did 53 posts in 2012. I am aiming for at least 100 for 2013.
2. Exercise - Boot Camp will help me achieve this!
3. Lose weight - Boot Camp, blogging healthy recipes, meal planning.
4. Paint - This is the only one I don't have a plan for. I just haven't done it in years.
5. Read more - Make a list of books I want to read.
6. Listen to the Bible in a year - Downloaded the app last night!
7. Get new glasses - Stresses me out to pay for the eye doctor and glasses in the same visit. I'll make an appointment for one pay check and get glasses the next!
8. Call my Nanny more - I just set a reminder in my phone.
9. Save more - Set aside $50 every pay check (in hopes of maybe going to France to visit my cousin AND go to France).

Last but not least, I found a verse that is my most important and overall goal for 2013.

10. Psalm 145:2 Everyday I will bless you and praise your name forever and ever. - Talk to Jesus, read His words for me, and worship Him through singing (privately, not just during song time at church).

I really am so hopeful about 2013. My only New Years resolution for 2012 was to put myself out there and go on dates. I did it, but it wasn't good for me other than knowing it's better to wait for a Godly man to pursue me than have dating experiences. So here's to 2013!

Did you make any New Years resolutions?