Perfectionism & Oatmeal Whoopie Pies

I have a confession...

I'm not perfect.

I'm just not. I try to be, even though I shouldn't try to be and in no way can I ever be. I struggle with perfectionism. It's true. 

I just want to say out loud that I'm not perfect. I also want to say that I'm not always okay with not being perfect, but I'm trying to be.

In case you didn't know, not every thing I cook comes out so well. It just doesn't. One time I tried to make a homemade angel food cake and it looked far more like a flat frisbee than a fluffy angel cloud. 

Sometimes I drink coffee in the afternoon and stay up too late (like right now as I write this at 1AM). Sometimes I forget to put an item in my budget and it messes up my money plans. I'm really bad at calling friends. I'm even worse at sending letters. I freak out a little when plans change. I leave shoes on the floor. I lock my keys in my car. I rarely iron my clothes. 

So I just want you to know, even though I probably come across as trying to look like I have it all together with my meal plans, color coded Google calendars, documents, labels and folders, hair accessories and organized cabinets and refrigerator, I don't. Fact - it's hard for me to admit that! 

I know you don't expect me to be perfect. But the beasts called perfectionism and the enemy tell me that you do, society does, the world does, Christians do, and the church does. I need to say that I know you'll still like me despite being not perfect and not having it all together. 

I know that I'm far more disappointed that I didn't post my meal plan on Sunday as promised than you are. However, I do promise it's coming. The meals are planned and tomorrow morning (probably when you will read this) I will make my grocery list and shop. I have no good reason other than lack of motivation for writing for not posting. 

Sometimes motivation is so free flowing. Other times it's just not. And sometimes it hits at random times in the wee hours of the morning. I'm encouraged. I'm reading a devotion book recommended by a dear friend called It's a Wonderful (Imperfect) Life. Tonight I read, 

"God isn't the one who pressures us. He wants us to delight in our life and work - whatever it is at this season. Satisfaction and enjoyment are God's gift to us."

Through church and this book God is tugging at my heart. Tugging for me to surrender, to yield, to release, to trust, and to allow him to change things in me. I'm not perfect. It won't happen overnight. But I'm encouraged and this burst of encouragement again reminded me of the gifts and desires God has given me. Cooking, baking, writing, and blogging to name a few. And thus... inspiration. :) Confessional inspiration? 

Of course, I can't leave you empty handed. I probably should post an imperfect recipe to go along with this post, but I'm not gonna lie. This recipe is pretty darn great. Can we call it imperfect because it could be healthier? We'll go with that. 

I really do cook healthy most days. I promise I do. Even when feeding small groups of people or people who I feed all the time, I do make "healthy" desserts and they never complain (like the healthy pineapple upside down cupcakes I'll post soon). But... every once in a while for a special event (or because I had a bad day or just because), I make a non-altered (or minimally altered) recipe. 

Monday night my apartment hosted a Dips & Dessert night for my current RAs and new RAs for next year. The current girls brought either a dip or a dessert. I made both. The dip was my go to, no biggie. The dessert however, total biggie. As in deal. Not size. They were actually quite small little bite sized pieces of heaven. 

Oatmeal Whoppie Pies

Recipe adapted from Pioneer Woman. 

Ingredients: 

For cookies: 

• 2 cups brown sugar
• 1/2 cup butter, softended
• 1/4 cup shortening
• 1 large egg
• 1/4 cup egg beaters
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
• 1 teaspoon baking powder
• 3 tablespoons boiling water
• 1 teaspoon baking soda
• 1 1/4 cups whole wheat flour
• 1 1/4 cups all purpose flour
• 2 cups quick oats

For filling:

• Marshmallow cream 

Directions: 

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Cream brown sugar, butter, and shortening. Add eggs and egg beaters. Mix. Add salt, cinnamon, and baking powder and mix. Mix baking soda and boiling water. (I've never done this before, but the Pioneer Woman said to, so I did. I didn't notice a difference, but the cookies were good.) Add baking soda and water mixture to the bowl and mix. Add flours and oatmeal and mix well.

Scoop dough onto parchment-lined cookie sheets in rounded heaping teaspoons. Bake for 10 minutes. Remove from oven, transfer to a cooling rack, and let the cookies cool completely. 

Okay let's talk about filling. Do as she did and not as I did unless you want to be sticky and get an arm workout! She used pre-made marshmallow cream, which would have been MUCH easier. I had a bag of marshmallows I wanted to use, so I made a marshmallow cream by melting down the marshmallows and corn syrup over a double boiler. One of my coworker friends, Christine, said she liked it better that normal marshmallow cream, which she normally doesn't like. If you want to do it my way it's 1 bag of marshmallow to 6 tablespoons of light corn syrup. When I make these again, I'll probably actually make real homemade marshmallow cream from egg whites. 

If you use the pre-made stuff, just scoop on careful teaspoons full (I always type teaspoon fulls first - without fail). I tried scooping and ended up wearing far more of the filling than the cookies. I messily filled a gallon ziplock with the homemade marshmallow cream and piped a dollop on the cookies. 

Step Almost Done - Sandwich the cookies and the messy stuff. The End - EAT & ENJOY! And probably share. I lost count of how many this made, but over 30.